<p><strong><em>Your baby, your body, your plan </em></strong><br></p><p>The idea of giving birth can be overwhelming, but with a solid plan you’ll know what to expect and can feel sure all the vital bases will be covered. A birth plan is a guideline for communication between you, your support system, and medical staff. Here are tips for a <a href="https://esme.com/voices/perspectives/whats-a-solo-mom" target="_blank" class="wordlink">Solo Mom</a>’s birthing plan.</p><ul><li>Your comfort level with your ob-gyn or midwife is very important. If you don’t feel like your needs are being met physically or emotionally, change to a new doctor or midwife as soon as possible.</li><li>Create a support system for yourself of friends and family who will care for you before, during, and after your hospital stay. </li><li>Make a list of any allergies to medication or food you have and any current medications you may be taking.</li><li>Make a contact list with the names and information of your birth coaches and family. </li><li>Designate people to help you communicate with hospital staff during the delivery and with friends and family after you get home. That way you can stay focused on yourself and the baby.</li><li>Don’t be afraid to ask questions. Everyone wants you to be a happy and relaxed mother.</li><li>Be informed about your pain management options. Be specific about how you would like to reduce your discomfort during labor, if at all.</li><li>There are many birthing classes you can take during your <a href="https://esme.com/resources/c/pregnancy" target="_blank" class="wordlink">pregnancy</a>. Bring your labor coach or doula with you if possible. </li><li>Find out your medical caregiver’s policy on labor positions and movement. You may have access to a birthing ball, ropes, a birthing pool, being on hands and knees, and more. Check during your tour of the hospital or birth center, or ask your midwife about your options.</li><li>Speak to your medical professional prior to your labor about their percentage of episiotomy births and how to avoid tearing or being cut.</li><li>Many women like to have their placenta encapsulated or baked after the birth for additional nutrients. Talk to your medical caregiver about their policies and your options if this interests you.</li><li>It can be nice to dress your birthing room with electric candles and use aromatherapy to help keep you relaxed. </li><li>Make a playlist of your favorite tunes with a variety of moods to help you stay focused during the labor and birth.</li><li>If you are having a birth in a birthing center or hospital, ask that only necessary medical staff be in your room. It will keep your room quiet, and let you focus on your labor.</li><li>You will have the option to have one person stay with you during a C-section. It is good to have a clear idea ahead of time of who you would like to have with you in case you find yourself in an emergency C-section.</li><li>Bring some healthy snacks and drinks for after the birth. You will probably be hungry and thirsty.</li><li>Create a call or email list of friends and family—and ask some key people to help you notify everyone.</li><li>Pack your overnight bag with items for 4 days in case you end up having a C-section. </li><li>Remember to smile, breathe deeply, and love yourself.</li></ul><hr><p><span style="font-size: 11px;">Image via Shutterstock.com</span></p>
<p><em><strong>Advice from a new <a href="https://esme.com/voices/perspectives/whats-a-solo-mom" target="_blank" class="wordlink">Solo Mom</a>, Sidney Cavaricci-White</strong></em></p><p><strong></strong><strong>Q: What’s the hardest part about <a href="https://esme.com/resources/c/parenting" target="_blank" class="wordlink">parenting</a> on your own?</strong></p><p>A: The hardest part about parenting on my own is that I have to cover all the parent roles. I have to make all the decisions by myself. I do try to include my daughter’s father in as much as I can, but mostly I end up doing it by myself. The late nights and the total lack of time for myself are more practical hardships.</p><p><strong><strong>Q: </strong>What advice would you give to pregnant women who are solo?</strong> </p><p>A: Get a rocking sleeper or bassinet. (Anything that will make that baby want to sleep more is a blessing.) Keep an eye on your stock of diapers and wipes. (You won’t be able to send anyone out to get more if you run out unexpectedly.) Most importantly, pamper yourself! You’ll be dedicating all your time and energy to someone who can’t show you how appreciated you are, so you have to appreciate yourself as much as you can.</p><p><strong><strong>Q: </strong>When you get demoralized, what picks you back up again?</strong> </p><p>A: It may sound cheesy, but I think about my daughter—this wild and incredible little person who is just so perfect. I think about how she is who she is because of me, and that she needs me to be strong and do what I have to do. </p><p>Sometimes if we’re having a really rough night, I throw our schedule out the window and I put her in her high chair with a snack and paint, or we dance around the house like crazy people until we feel better. </p><p><strong><strong>Q: </strong>What’s one of your guilty pleasures?</strong></p><p>A: My guiltiest pleasure as a mother is probably that I nurse her in the middle of the night. My daughter is 100% sleep-trained for her naps and at bedtime, but around 1:00 a.m., I wake up to find her laughing or crying, watching me, waiting for me to pick her up and put her in bed next to me at my breast. She’s old enough to sleep with me, so I get extra hours of sleep (which I love), but really having her so close and cuddled is just my favorite thing ever. </p><p><strong><strong>Q: </strong>Tell us about a moment from the past week where you felt like a great mom, where you thought, “Yes! Nailed it!”</strong></p><p>A: This week she started giving kisses—real, actual, not-slobbering-all-over-you kisses—with puckered lips and everything. She thinks it’s so funny. How happy and affectionate she is makes me feel like I’m doing something right. </p><hr><p><span style="font-size: 11px;">Photo credit Sidney Cavaricci-White</span><br></p>