<p><strong><em>The good, the bad, and the ugly</em></strong></p><p>In honor of a famous Clint Eastwood spaghetti western, here are some tips to help the <a href="https://esme.com/voices/perspectives/whats-a-solo-mom" target="_blank" class="wordlink">Solo Mom</a> who is <em>always</em> responsible for getting other humans up and at ’em. Managing the Wild West of the early-morning cattle—I mean school—rush can be good . . . bad . . . or ugly.</p><p><strong>Basic rules</strong></p><ol><li>No showers ever.</li><li>Five minutes for toothbrushing, bathroom evacuation, and hair brushing (applies to adult and progeny alike). </li><li>Indoor voices only. </li></ol><p><strong>Getting up</strong></p><ul><li>The Good: A gentle last-minute shake and quiet drawing open of curtains.</li><li>The Bad: Two alarms in every room!</li><li>The Ugly: Pots and pans and you singing “Ready” to the tune of “Happy” by Pharrell Williams or the chorus from Fitz and the Tantrums’ “The Walker.”</li></ul><p><strong>Getting dressed</strong></p><p><em>For you: </em></p><ul><li>The Good: Arrange your clothes the night before.</li><li>The Bad: Trade in those pajamas for workout wear. Spring out of bed, ready for action.</li><li>The Ugly: What’s wrong with pajamas?</li></ul><p><em>For them:</em></p><ul><li>The Good: Arrange their clothes (or, in the case of teenage girls, get them to arrange their clothes) the night before.</li><li>The Bad: Have them sleep in their clothes.</li><li>The Ugly: Just wear what you had on yesterday!</li></ul><p><strong>Food</strong></p><ul><li>The Good: A healthy overnight oatmeal blend you have lovingly stored in BPA-free jars accompanied by a fruit smoothie.</li><li>The Bad: Instant oatmeal, frozen waffles/French toast with instant orange juice.</li><li>The Ugly: Trader Joe’s This [insert fruit here] walks into a bar... What? It’s healthy!</li></ul><p><strong>Lunch</strong></p><ul><li>The Good: Made the night before and ready to go.</li><li>The Bad: Top Ramen and/or a jar of peanut butter with crackers and a plastic spoon.</li><li>The Ugly: Yesterday’s uneaten lunch. So? It’s recycling!</li></ul><p><strong>Homework</strong></p><ul><li>The Good: Homework packed up the night before.</li><li>The Bad: Just shove everything in a backpack, and figure it out on the way.</li><li>The Ugly: Tell the teacher your mom ate your homework! <em>We’re late!</em></li></ul><hr><p><span style="font-size: 11px;">Image via Shutterstock.com</span></p>
